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Posted on Aug 03, 2014 at 11:25 AM

So what is it about the nice guys, that causes them to always finish last? Why is it that so many women seem to prefer either a bad boy, a thug, or a guy who is "rough around the edges" in some way? Is it because these types of men are perceived as being more fun and exciting to be with? Or is it because the nice guys are thought of as being weak or soft?

 

Are you a guy who has had unfavorable success with the ladies, as a result of using the nice guy approach? Maybe you've taken the time to type and send out nice, polite, and thoughtful emails, only to not even receive a simple "thanks but no thanks" reply in return. Perhaps you've been a complete gentleman while out on dates, and that too has gotten you nowhere.

 

If you have an opinion on this topic that can either confirm or deny what I am saying here, then feel free to leave a comment. If you're a man who has been rejected for being a nice guy, I hope that you leave a comment. And if you're a woman who doesn't like nice guys for whatever reason, feel free to leave a comment as well.

 


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If you don't stand for something, then you will fall for anything.
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Posted on Sep 18, 2017 at 07:42 PM

Quoting removed_ourheartsas1_110708605:

Good day everyone,

 

Your observations are echoed and empathized.

 

However, I've learned that beneath all of the fluff of being either, God's love demonstrated and expressed in readings as  1 Corinthians 13 conveys 'universal' characteristics.  In the end, both will realize, seek, and experience that truth.

 

 

 Thank you for posting the echoed observations and may everyone eventually be united with those for whom we were designed.

 

Stay encouraged!



Thanks for the kind words of encouragement. We could all use it, especially considering the current state of today's dating scene. 



If you don't stand for something, then you will fall for anything.
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Posted on Sep 15, 2017 at 03:28 PM

Quoting Mz_Jazzing_G:

lol,,,,, Fahalahahaha



I'm glad that you were able to find some humor in all of this. 



If you don't stand for something, then you will fall for anything.
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Posted on Aug 30, 2017 at 03:06 PM

Quoting marineblue:

Well, I for one prefer the nice guys, not the macho type. I have friends, however, who like the 'bad boys' type. Needless to say years later they are regretting their choice. I think a lot about their preference has to do with the way they were raised and the kind of male role models they met growing up. 



I think a lot of women tend to put many of the nice guys that they know in the "friend zone" without even considering them as potential relationship material. And once a man gets put in the friend zone there's virtually no coming back from that.


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Posted on Aug 28, 2017 at 03:21 PM

Quoting goodman3387:

Reading what you wrote here I for one have to agree with you 100% I am a nice guy been here on this site for over 5 years and never have I got a reply back from any of the females I respond to. I am a nice guy but a strong black man just because I was rasied to treat a lady with respect dose not mean I am weak it only means I have a heart.

 

I find these type of men well so call men these females like these days are the ones that wear their pants below their knees in better words thugs, two places these kind of men will take you, prison or grave. Yes its true nice intelligent men like myself finish last I see it everyday in real life. When these women get dogged out by these guys they become damaged goods



Thanks for your comment, Goodman3387. One thing that I've noticed is that the thugs ALWAYS have women on their arms. And some of these guys may not have a job, a car, or a home, but they will always have a woman on their arm.

And when these women end up getting dogged out by these thugs and become damaged goods, that's when they try to come back and find a nice guy, but most of the times it's too late.


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Posted on Aug 27, 2017 at 04:38 AM

Quoting Holberry22:

I agree, I don't think nice guy finish last.  Finding a nice guy is hard.  In my bio I stated that I was kind of a nerd. I love intelligence.  It is an attractive trait.  Actually finding anyone, someone in any category, has been sparse.  I have noted in some blogs other members echo the same in their feedback.  I am looking for a nice White or Asian male.  



Thanks for posting a comment. I've heard that a lot of women are attracted to intelligence. I hope that you do find that nice White or Asian man that you're seeking.



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Posted on Aug 27, 2017 at 04:28 AM

Quoting phea44:

WHY NICE GUYS FAIL WITH WOMEN(Part 2)

 

Nice guys often get nervous and develop a case of COLD FEET when they are in the presence of women, especially the unusually attractive women.

 

Here are a couple of formulas to remember:

 

1) Cold Feet=Cold/Dry Other Things Below The Waist

 

2) The Usually Nice Guy Routine=See Formula #1

 

 

So let's talk about these ideas.

 

If you ever hear a woman say the words, "He's nice", you can pull out all the money you have on you and bet that she's not ATTRACTED to the guy she's talking about.

 

Women don't use the  word "Nice" to describe men they're FEELING it for.  They just DON'T!

 

So, why would you want to make SURE she never feels anything other than friendship for you?

 

Hmmmmm.

 

What you're telling me is that a super-babe that you may have known a few years ago, and was super-nice to, and you couldn't make anything happen then...so you're thinking of pouring twice as much niceness, hoping that things might work better the second time around?

 

Hmmmmm.

 

Here's a good rule of thumb:

 

If your behaviour isn't getting you the consistent results that you'd like to get, CHANGE IT.

 

Do ANYTHING different.

 

I'm serious here.

 

If what you are doing isn't working, DO SOMETHING ELSE IMMEDIATELY!

 

And, if you've FOUND SOMETHING that works, then KEEP DOING IT!

 

 

(To Be Continued)



This is some great reading material, bro. Thanks for sharing it.


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Posted on Aug 26, 2017 at 07:31 PM

Reading what you wrote here I for one have to agree with you 100% I am a nice guy been here on this site for over 5 years and never have I got a reply back from any of the females I respond to. I am a nice guy but a strong black man just because I was rasied to treat a lady with respect dose not mean I am weak it only means I have a heart.

 

I find these type of men well so call men these females like these days are the ones that wear their pants below their knees in better words thugs, two places these kind of men will take you, prison or grave. Yes its true nice intelligent men like myself finish last I see it everyday in real life. When these women get dogged out by these guys they become damaged goods


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Posted on Feb 24, 2017 at 02:51 PM

I agree, I don't think nice guy finish last.  Finding a nice guy is hard.  In my bio I stated that I was kind of a nerd. I love intelligence.  It is an attractive trait.  Actually finding anyone, someone in any category, has been sparse.  I have noted in some blogs other members echo the same in their feedback.  I am looking for a nice White or Asian male.  


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Questions, answers, feedback, experiences that others have had using social media to embark on a relationship
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Posted on Nov 28, 2015 at 05:07 AM

Well, I for one prefer the nice guys, not the macho type. I have friends, however, who like the 'bad boys' type. Needless to say years later they are regretting their choice. I think a lot about their preference has to do with the way they were raised and the kind of male role models they met growing up. 


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Posted on Jun 22, 2015 at 04:42 PM

Quoting leondal1:

I really don't think nice guys finish last. Weak guys finish last.

 

A lot of women have that traditional side that likes when a man takes charge a bit in the relationship. Plan things, make decisions. Women respond to strength and confidence.

 

But you can be strong and still be loving, caring and affectionate. Show these things with confidence and conviction!

 

Being strong means being sure of yourself and going 100% at what you want. 



Yes, there's definitely a difference between being "nice," and being "weak." But the world is changing, and I sometimes wonder what percentage of women still like men to open their doors for them, or pull out their chairs, or even plan out things and make big decisions.

 

But I do agree with you that one can still be strong, loving, caring, and affectionate all at the same time.


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Posted on Jun 22, 2015 at 11:18 AM

I really don't think nice guys finish last. Weak guys finish last.

 

A lot of women have that traditional side that likes when a man takes charge a bit in the relationship. Plan things, make decisions. Women respond to strength and confidence.

 

But you can be strong and still be loving, caring and affectionate. Show these things with confidence and conviction!

 

Being strong means being sure of yourself and going 100% at what you want. 


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Posted on Jun 15, 2015 at 10:30 PM

I agree, nice guy's do seem to finish last. But its more like "Nice people finish last"  its probably because most people try to be something they are not. Or perhaps they are too shy...  or there is another underlying reason for it such as lack of self confidence. Speaking for myself when I was much younger., I was a shy person with little or no self confidence.. It got me no where! I always wondered why. It seemed I bent over backwards all the time trying to be the nicest guy I could be and the one comment I remember getting a lot of was: You're too nice! I thought they liked me but they really wanted nothing more to do with me. It was because I lacked self confidence. I never changed who I was, I just made a few adjustments as I matured and got older.

 

Those bad guy's out there that you mentioned....have a lot of game. They have the confidence that women look for. Unable to hide who they really are, they put just enough nice guy forward to compliment all that confidence they know the woman is looking for. Its a deadly combination for a nice woman and a lot of them get hurt and fall for it. I not only hate it for them but for the nice guys too because it seems we get labled for the bad guy's behavior.

 

 

So I would say the best thing you can do is just be yourself, get out and show those women who you really are and keep it real! Some lucky one will take notice and be happy she did.... 

 

 

 

 


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Posted on Jun 09, 2015 at 09:03 AM

Quoting jzbl06:

Personally, I prefer nice guys. I have never liked bad boys because I believe that being with a person that is considred "bad" never turns out to be a good situation. I believe one of the reasons why good guys finish last is  because of the women they try to pursue. Now typically, and I am not saying all men, but typically a man wants someone who is attractive and fit first and then everything else comes after. My question to the good guys is do you you want someone that is beautiful but have a nasty attitude? Now I am not saying that all pretty girls have nasty attitudes, however, I have seen first hand with my own male friends how they are treated after buying a drink for a woman or going to speak to a woman who is around her friends. It is not easy. I think good girls finish last just like good guys for the same reasons. Everyone want what they can't have. Until people stop chasing what the think is good for them as opposed to what is best for them, both good men and women will always finish last.



Nice girls finish last too? This is an interesting perspective, one that I hadn't thought of. Thanks for your reply. 



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Posted on May 27, 2015 at 10:52 AM

Personally, I prefer nice guys. I have never liked bad boys because I believe that being with a person that is considred "bad" never turns out to be a good situation. I believe one of the reasons why good guys finish last is  because of the women they try to pursue. Now typically, and I am not saying all men, but typically a man wants someone who is attractive and fit first and then everything else comes after. My question to the good guys is do you you want someone that is beautiful but have a nasty attitude? Now I am not saying that all pretty girls have nasty attitudes, however, I have seen first hand with my own male friends how they are treated after buying a drink for a woman or going to speak to a woman who is around her friends. It is not easy. I think good girls finish last just like good guys for the same reasons. Everyone want what they can't have. Until people stop chasing what the think is good for them as opposed to what is best for them, both good men and women will always finish last.


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Posted on Feb 16, 2015 at 10:45 AM

Quoting Kelsey1990:

Hi guys...I really can't say why nice guys finish last but I must say I feel the exact same way about good girls. We often get looked over as well.



Good girls often get overlooked? I'm surprised to hear that Kelsey. I thought the good girls were always in high demand. 



If you don't stand for something, then you will fall for anything.
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Posted on Feb 15, 2015 at 10:34 AM

Quoting JoyfulKat:

I think people see nice as bland.  Every woman wants a little spice, a little challenge, a little strength when she meets a man. He can do those things and be nice at the same time.  Flash a strong, confident smile with some serious eye contact,  and it's a combination an intelligent, nice woman will want to explore. 



Well stated. I tend to agree with much of what you've said. I think for the most part, people do want a challenge, and most of the time they do see nice as being bland.



If you don't stand for something, then you will fall for anything.
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Posted on Jan 05, 2015 at 08:15 PM

Quoting Likeitmlky:

this is funny, BUT, as a nice guy, i can attest that it's true. people say that i'm really attractive, however, i can't talk to women because i WAY too nice! It, actually, cracks me up, it really does. nice guys don't ALWAYS finish last, but, in most cases, we do. which is probably why i can't even get a response on a dating site. smdh lol i going for a run, nice guys, have a nice day.


Yes...even for an attractive/handsome "nice" man, most women will have pretty much the same reaction:

 

"He looks good...BUT HE'S TOO NICE!"

 

You see, being NICE doesn't present a challenge, it's not interesting and it's far too predictable.

 

What most women are looking for in a relationship, is a certain level of intrigue; they may not express it in quite the

 

way that I just have.....but that's it in a nut shell.

 

 

Stay tuned...I'm about to continue my exposition on why Nice Guys Almost Always Finish Last, but I will also tell

 

"tell" you how to remedy this situation.  Soooooo......STAY TUNED!

 


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Posted on Dec 28, 2014 at 11:25 AM

this is funny, BUT, as a nice guy, i can attest that it's true. people say that i'm really attractive, however, i can't talk to women because i WAY too nice! It, actually, cracks me up, it really does. nice guys don't ALWAYS finish last, but, in most cases, we do. which is probably why i can't even get a response on a dating site. smdh lol i going for a run, nice guys, have a nice day.


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Posted on Dec 28, 2014 at 02:07 AM

 Guess I'll put in my half century's worth. Started out being a nice guy like my mother said. It NEVER did me any good. Better to just be yourself. Every guy has at least a couple of "bad" habits. If you don't have any get a couple. No matter what stick with them. Smoking,drinking colorful language whatever. You will be better off holding your ground than giving ground too fast. Something to think about.....


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